Monday, March 8, 2010

Sex anywhere or Out of the Bed and into the Frying pan

In the hubby and hullabaloo of daily life we all fall into routines.  These can be good in that it means the trash is always taken out, kids are picked up from school and other things get done.  An unfortunate side effect of these routines is our sex lives.  We get in the habit of only having sex in bed, at night, with the lights off, on the 3rd Sunday and only if your favorite team won...  The problem is that this even the greatest love makers can become bland and boring even with an extensive knowledge of the Kama sutra.
 
An easy way to help spice thing back up is to break that routine and have sex in any other part of your house.  There are lots of other rooms each with its own possibilities for wild adult fun.  Here I will not only give some ideas on the fun to be had in these rooms but also how to help make a quick fuck in these rooms possible with only a little redecorating.
 
So how do you make your other rooms more fuckable?  All it takes is a little ingenuity.  No one wants to break the mood and have to run to the bathroom or the bedroom for a condom, and no one wants to stop fucking to run for lube.  So look around your other rooms and look for those little nooks and crannies that you can use as your secret hideaways.  These should be easy for you to get to, but also out of site of guests and out of reach of little hands (Even if you don't have kids, your friends might). I suggest putting together small cookie bags.  This could be as simple as a zip lock bag with two condoms and a travel size bottle of lube.  You can also make it part of the room and use an ornate box up high on a shelf, or a small purse or bag.  Whatever will fit in with you and not look like you're hiding something.

Living Room
Living rooms lend themselves to all kinds of sexual fun.  You have couches and chairs that make for great sexual fun.  Chairs and couches make great places for oral sex as they are comfortable for both people.  Most people have TV in their living rooms, or even great big entertainment theaters.  Slap your favorite porn in and see and hear it in a whole new way. Depending on the set up of your living room, here are some possible sex positions it can offer.  Bending her over the couch arm or back.  Him kneeling, her sitting on chair or couch.  Lying on the couch, spooning, him on top, or her on top.  Her astride him, facing him or away.  Really, it up to you how you do it, but just that you're in a room that you normally don't screw in can turn sex up a notch. Bean bags chairs and stools can be fun too.
 
Where to place your cookie bag?  In the couch, lift up the cushions, most couches have seams right along the edge that you can place your cookie bag so even if someone lifts the cushions they won't see it.  Most entertainment centers are tall with a lip on top.  This is also a great place to stash you cookie bag, if you're tall enough.  Some coffee tables have cabinets or draws.  Only use this if you don't store anything else in there that you might want to get out.

Dining Room
Dining tables can be all kinds of fun, but with a warning.  Check your table out first, if you can't sit on the edge without it trying to fall over or creaking I wouldn't use it.  Dining tables usually are at the right height for the girl to lie on her back with her lover standing holding her legs.  Bending her over the table works just as well with the added bonus of giving her support.  Also, dining room chairs without arms are great for the women straddling her guy.  If you like bondage play, dining tables and chairs also are great for strapping people to as the legs and arms are great to tie to, but again, check yours out to make sure they will hold up to the abuse.
 
Now where to hide your cookie bag?  If small kids are not a problem, taping it to the underside of your table will work.  If not, look to the pictures on the wall, you can usually hide a small package behind them.  If you have any kind of dish cabinet in your dining room, that gravy boat with lid that you only use at Thanksgiving will work (Just remember to take it out before your family shows up for turkey!)

Kitchen
The kitchen, you would think the perfect place for cookies!  Unfortunately, the kitchen does not lead itself to sex easily other then leaning over countertops or oral while sitting on them.  If you have an island you have a few more options, but not many.  But this can be a great place to start with some eating out before moving to the dining room for the main course.
 
Stashing a cookie bag in the kitchen is up to you; I don't bother, but if you want to, stay high and in places where you normally do not get into.  Don't place them near any appliances; heat will break down latex in condoms.  So avoid above the refrigerator, stove, or microwave.  Maybe an unmarked spice jar?

Bathroom
Now here's a room that was made for fun.  First off, even if you don't have sex, save water and shower with your lover.  This time can be bonding time as well as sexual time.  Washing, caressing, and holding while water rains down on the two of you.  A few warnings - make sure you are rinsed of any soap before starting any sexual activities.  If you think it hurts in your eyes, think of other places.  The taste isn't great either. Also, check to make sure what you can and cannot grab during sex.  That small handle on the soap dish in the wall may look sturdy, but check first before you put your weight on it, same goes for the shower curtain bar.  The sink can be fun too, but again, check before you use it to hold her up.
 
Sex in the shower with condoms can hurt; I use the shower mostly for foreplay.  The nice thing is the medicine cabinet is a normal place to put a box of condoms, so use it.  Just check it every once in awhile especially if you have had teenagers over.  At my house I have told my friends teenagers that they are there and they can take a few if they need them.  I would rather spend a few bucks and them to be safe then to have to get the call asking for a ride to the docs.

Office
This can be a great place for not only sex but role playing too.  The boss seducing his secretary, the secretary getting revenge on a demanding boss by spanking him, the ideas are endless.  Offices chairs are great for oral sex, bondage, straddling sex and him kneeling in front of her.  Just be careful if your chair leans back to lock it in place or that it can take the weight of both of you leaning back without tipping over.  Desks are usually sturdy enough for just about any kind of play, and what you can do on it depends on how clean you keep it.
 
Plus with all the drawers that office desks have, there is bound to be a place to store your cookie bag.  Just remember to place it so it's easy to get to but not someplace you're into all the time. I find the Tax return folder works great.

Front Porch
Sex on your front porch can be very exhilarating.  You out front, being naughty with cars driving by, and they don't know.  If you're going to have fun on your front or back porch I would only do it at night without your porch light on, and maybe under a blanket or with her wearing a skirt or dress.  Now this will depend on how you porch is set up and how open it is.  Just don't be too loud or you might end up with some unexpected visitors in uniform.  To help with front porch sex, make sure you have nice porch furniture that is comfortable for both of you. 
 
As for stashing your cookie bag, I would not place one here, but right inside your front door.  The elements can play havoc on latex, so cold and heat is bad for long time storage.  But right inside your front door, say near your key rack, or anything else there is a great place.

Backyard
Backyards can be fun, but again take caution when having sex outside.  I will elaborate later on this, but for right now, unless you have an enclosed backyard with no two story neighbors, let's not go here until later.
 
One last note for parents with kids.  As wonderful as having sex in the rest of your house is, if you have kids that can get out of bed by themselves I would only have sex in rooms that you can lock, or when they are not home.  You can help by buying those cheap hook and eye locks and placing them high enough that only you two can reach them.  You can also help the kids decorate by buying them a bell for their door so you have a warning when they leave their rooms.
 
For those unfortunate souls that have been having sex only in their bedrooms I hope that I have given you the info needed to take your sex life into the rest of your house.  For those that already do, I applaud you.  So go out and enjoy your house, even places that I have not mentioned, you know your house better then I.  Start looking at it as your sexual playground.  Until next time!
 
Later!
 
-Haven De Lancret

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